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Visiting Hours | January 3, 2008 | Horst visits the comatose Raj in the hospital -- and is himself visited.
Taser Love | December 6, 2007 | At a press conference, Stockwell Day says Raj Malik was tasered as a "heroic intervention" to prevent Economy Class Syndrome.
Homecoming | November 29, 2007 | Raj's flight on Renditionair returns, finally, from Afghanistan. His friends, an ambulance and a press conference with Stockwell Day are there to greet him.
One Man's Tragedy | November 22, 2007 | Celia calls to tell Horst that Raj is on a flight from Afghanistan. But he's in a coma. Franks sees this crisis as an opportunity for Horst to patch things up with Celia.
Wait for the Results | August 23, 2007 | Horst goes on another Gaiagra-induced torture-porn trip, in which his doctor dunks him in a boiling hot tub, refusing to let him stop taking the drug. Or does he?
Bunker Mentality | June 28, 2007 | Cosmo shows Horst his brand new, revolutionary communications device: the dPhony. It debunks anything. Case in point: Harper's statements on Afghanistan.
Hewers of Wood | May 17, 2007 | Stephen Harper calls Stockwell Day out from the dungeon where he resides. Donya and her lawyer threaten to sue unless Raj is released by Canadian troops in Afghanistan.
Friendly Firewall | May 10, 2007 | Donya finally gets a meeting with the Prime Minister, who gives her the news that her husband has been transfered to the Canadian army base in Kandahar.
All's Fair in Love and War | May 3, 2007 | Somewhere in a CIA prison, Raj is told his wife Donya is sleeping with a women. Spy photos seem to bare this out. Is this another lies-from-home interrogation tactic?
Support Group | March 8, 2007 | In a support group for wives of the detained, Celia is asked where her man is being held.
G.I. Steve Meets Terror Bear | March 1, 2007 | What happens when a heavy-duty action leader meets a stuffed teddy bear that's soft'n'cuddly on terror?
Rogue Canada | November 30, 2006 | Stephen Harper wants credit for cutting CO2 emissions from Taliban suicide bombers.
Home | September 14, 2006 | News from home for Raj, held captive by the Americans: Stephen Harper is upset that the U.S. won't share its no-fly list. Stephen wants to make lists of his own.
American Care | August 31, 2006 | Donya receives a visit from Officer Stephen Harper, who informs her why the Americans won't release her husband, who is being held in Afghanistan.
Stockholm | August 24, 2006 | U.S. forces in Afghanistan rescue Canadian hostage Raj Malik. After three years in captivity - first in the hands of Canadians, then Pakistanis, then wannabe Al Qaeda, Raj is free. Or is he?
Tuvalu | June 29, 2006 | Frank deals with global warming and the war on terror in one fell swoop - and gets reprimanded by Stephen Harper for creating competition.
Asymmetric | June 22, 2006 | "These suicides were not an act of desperation, rather an act of asymmetric warfare waged against us." - Rear Admiral Harry Harris, Guantanamo Camp Commander
Founding Fathers | June 1, 2006 | Raj's kidnapper outlines why he believes terrorists will bankrupt America. They've stolen their technique from the Americans themselves. Reagan makes a post-humous appearance.
Instead | May 4, 2006 | Harper's plan for the future.
Terror Mandate | April 6, 2006 | Raj gets an earful from his captor.
Jihad | March 30, 2006 | Raj discovers he was taken hostage because he was mistaken for a Dane.
A Better Prison | March 23, 2006 | Pakistan. Raj is being transferred to another prison when a bomb explodes under the vehicle.
Work Out | February 2, 2006 | Donya and Celia compare notes on why they are not getting any.
Resolution | December 29, 2005 | Bush's New Year's resolution: Kinder, merrier renditions.
Stress'n'Duress | December 15, 2005 | After two years in prison, Raj is extradited from Canada.
Twisted Weasel | December 08, 2005 | Raj gets a demonstration of the twisted weasel pose from his torture guru.
Operatives | November 24, 2005 | Raj's interrogator in a Canadian prison threatens to send him to Pakistan. Raj protests that he is Canadian.
Daytimer Sex | September 29, 2005 | Horst is shocked when Celia suggests she pencil him in for sex.
Interrogation | September 15, 2005 | An intelligence agent tries force Raj to admit his comments about suicide wings were actually code for a terrorist plot.
Five Stages of Grief | September 8, 2005 | Katrina vs. Dubya. Katrina wins.
Poverty Unlimited | August 25, 2005 | Des is afraid to go out.
Living Daylights | August 18, 2005 | Extending daylight saving time is part of the War on Terror.
Workout | June 16, 2005 | Raj's solitary confinement puts a crimp in Donya's sex life.
No | April 28, 2005 | Horst fears he has what may be the first instance of Gulf War Syndrome caused by babysitting.
Babysitting | April 21, 2005 | Celia wants Horst to join her babysitting Donya and Raj's kids as a dry run on parenthood. But Horst has Arcade Fire tickets. Another classic relationship moment.
Family Values | March 31, 2005 | Spongebob Squarepants claims he was forced to have sex with Buster the Bunny to prove he has a secret agenda to force homosexuality on America's children. George Bush vehemently denies the allegation.
Gay Agenda | March 24, 2005 | SpongeBob Squarepants and Buster the Bunny are arrested under suspicion of having a hidden gay agenda. A cartoon Abu Ghraib ensues. Parents, hide your childrens' eyes during this part.
Most Wanted | March 17, 2005 | George Bush is disappointed that Canadian Prime Minister Paul Martin won't join him to protect his nation against gay-washing kiddie shows.
Cultural Export | March 10, 2005 | Fear Factor meets "extraordinary rendition."
Go to Jail | December 16, 2004 | Donya holds a press conference in order to garner media attention for Raj's plight. He's been in jail on a security certificate for almost a year.
George's Prayer | December 9, 2004 | George Bush visits Paul Martin. On the menu is cluster bomb-seared baby Iraqis bathed in a tortured detainee sweat sauce. Among other delicacies.
O Dubya | November 27, 2003 | An anthem to encourage extraordinary rendition, for Canadian Muslims: O Dub-y-a! Deport us from our land! To foreign jails... That follow your command!
Evildoers | July 18, 2002 | "I'll smoke them corporate evildoers out of their holes!" George W. is on the warpath to find Osama Bin Enron.
Twas the Night Before Christmas | December 20, 2001 | Twas the night before Christmas in darkest Don Jail, all the cells overflowing with those denied bail... One inmate suspected of criminal terror lost hope for release and fell into despair...
Hate | September 20, 2001 | A variation on one word, in response to the September 11 attack on New York.