Now and then, I find it fun to play with verse. I've done the Lord's Prayer (as told by George W. Bush at a state dinner that features cluster-bomb seared baby Iraqis in a tortured detainee-sweat sauce); Twas the Night Before Christmas (when Horst was in jail for a short time under suspicion of being a terrorist, and I was able to [partially] rhyme Saddam with Oxfam); and another version of Canada's national anthem (that time as a pean to O-Dubya).
As Stephen Harper endlessly trumpets, we have a New Government. (The way he puts it, you'd we were getting another constitution.) Well, that means it's high time for a New Anthem. (Last week featured Harper's made-in-Canada plan to cut suicide emissions -- and unveiled our New Flag.) I know I've stretched the rhyming a little, with "Rogues Canada, Iran and North Korea" being a far-fetched stand-in for "O Canada, we stand on guard for thee." But the syllable count was about right and the image was too good to pass up.
The first verse refers to the fact that because an area the size of Florida is slated oil sands strip mining in Alberta (a quarter of the province), Canada's greenhouse gas emissions will actually double by 2012. This is more than simply ignoring Kyoto. It's an inverse Kyoto. We're burning down our house as if there are plenty more where this one came from. More on how oil sands development will decimate Alberta's forests, cause acid rain and create a moonscape (in addition to the climate repercussions) can be found at the Pembina Institute's Oil Sands Watch.
Meanwhile, Environment Minister Rona Ambrose is collecting Air Denials points.
10 Years Ago This Week: December 5, 1996
This cartoon commented on Ontario Premier Mike Harris' privatization rampage. No public service was exempt from his marauding free-marketeers. Jails, schools, hospitals -- all were fair game. Life-Mart was the New Ontario. You could never leave. (Notice that nothing in Life-Mart has any shade of gray. It's all black-and-white.)
Looking for a gift for a politically minded comics reader? The Weltschmerz comic book just might be the ticket. No need to go to Life-Mart -- order it here (see ad at top) or visit one of the fine independent bookstores below:
Toronto:
Pages, 256 Queen Street West (at John). On the graphic novels table.
The Beguiling, 601 Markham Street (near Bloor and Bathurst)
Book City, three locations - 501 Bloor St. West, 348 Danforth Ave., 663 Yonge St.
Hairy Tarantula, 354 Yonge Street (near Dundas).
David Mirvish Books, 596 Markham St.
Guelph:
The Bookshelf, 41 Quebec Street.
Macondo Books, 18 Wilson Street
Waterloo: Words Worth Books, 100 King Street South
Kitchener: KW Bookstore, 308 King Street West
Hamilton: Bryan Prince Bookseller, 1060 King Street West
Ottawa: Collected Works, 1242 Wellington Street West (at Holland)
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